No regrets at twenty, standing at thirty.
At the age of 30, it is probably not difficult to have a handy job and a stable and stable family. We have always had a sense of mission in a time-point style, urging us to go to school, work, get married, and have children. It would be beyond reproach if we could step into a stable middle age with the plan. The strange thing is that some people have not experienced the impulsive toss of twenty years old. And stumbling, regard the node of life as the end of the stage task, for example, if you are admitted to university, you will no longer focus on your studies, and if you find a job, you will give up personal growth. The careful weighing is actually to make a choice once and for all. Best to do it once and for all.
I have encountered many doubts on this issue once and for all. This is a bit of a misunderstanding. After all, my life so far is in a circle where stability is paramount. It has brought me financial independence that is not rich and a relaxed spirit without worries. In the two-way choice between individuals and society, we cannot choose our own social division of labor at will, so we naturally have to compromise on our lifestyle. But what is born once and for all in a stable life is not contentment, but a stagnant state of resistance to change and boredom.
Starting a family and starting a business is beyond reproach, but the way of thinking that strives to remain unchanged has no positive effect on a stable life. I prefer life to be a novel that is updated year-round, with surprises in addition to the main structure, rather than a college entrance examination composition answer sheet. After confirming the proposition, spread it out according to the three-paragraph method, which is enough for 800 words. Completely relieved. The fixed way of thinking makes us blindly piece together for the sake of space, equating self-identity with the score on the roll, and we want to fit everything according to the template prepared in advance, and we lose the ability to make active choices. In the end, we can only be careful. to please life.
The occlusion of the way of thinking does have a certain relationship with the external environment. I don't know when such a trend emerged. When encountering setbacks, I always find the root cause from the original family, and then search for any childhood shadows that can be beaten by eight poles. It is true that some parents will instill in their children the idea of "one-time effort can exchange for a lifetime of ease", and even cultivating interest is done once and for all. When I was a child, I was forced to learn the piano and passed the tenth grade, which was not only used in the examinations. Bonus points, and because of convenience, it is stipulated that this is a lifetime interest. There are many theories in the field of psychology that can lift people's spirits, but I chose this one. I guess it is because no one can find it more than ten years ago. This responsibility is easily pushed, and I can lie down and become a victim. . The children around you have three interest classes a day, but the adults haven’t learned a new thing for three years. Don’t throw the blame on the original family. Since you have complained, don’t let yourself repeat the same mistakes.
Regardless of material things, the greatest wealth that a family of origin can provide should be the ability to accept and adapt to change. Still insist on waiting for the moment.
Of course, under the premise of the established thinking mode, everyone still has their own comfortable way of life, so there must be people who don't like to accept new things. Concentration is indeed more precious in the present day when there are countless options. The "craftsman spirit" that has been repeatedly mentioned recently is not only a spur, but also a call for spiritual independence. However, the "craftsman spirit" has become a shield for laziness in some sophistry, and their biggest praise for the "craftsman spirit" is that they read the article pushed by the official account, deeply sympathized with it and forwarded it in the circle of friends by the way.
Why do we always want to do it once and for all, and when we are stubbornly unwilling to accept new things, we still don’t put in the energy to make our own things perfect.
I think this is because more and more people are "fake growth". Before we mentioned precociousness, most of them have experienced too many hardships in life, but now personal experience is no longer a necessary condition. This is a "raider era". After reading a few romance novels, I am proficient in routines, and I have read a few fast food in the workplace. Just like adding wings to the tiger, the fragmented information makes people mistakenly believe that they have gained a lot. It seems that all problems can be found on the Internet. The customs clearance secrets are full of skills and tricks, but very few people remind us that personal growth is the most important thing. Sincerity. thing.
I haven't mentioned the word "growth" for a long time, because in a chat, when I expressed the view that self-growth is imprisoned by the unchanging environment, I was ridiculed by the other party. Is it still possible to continue to use this word at this age? Too childish and hypocritical. Since then, I have been puzzled: why "growth" is a disdainful word for some adults, and people who constantly improve themselves are regarded as young children who are not free from diapers, and rush to "comb their hair to look like adults" disguise But it seems to be more sophisticated. Later, I gradually figured out that if you meet such a person, the last book he has read is the prescribed bibliography for high school Chinese homework, the latest skill he has learned is the copier operation at the beginning of his career, and the most independent time is four years in college. In the student dormitory, the most recent social etiquette is to be polite when you are young, so you can't talk about growth and change in front of him. Maybe it's just a daily life for you, but for him, you must keep hiding your self-esteem.
People who want to do it once and for all are good at spotting patterns because they force themselves to sort out a path without variables. But this does not mean that they are thinking. Thinking is a process of negation and exploration aimed at breaking through time and space after sufficient accumulation, rather than building walls that avoid disadvantages and amplify advantages. Keeping thinking is the only way if you don't want to be completely out of a stable life or lose yourself once and for all. At the very least, you have to figure out what you want, and this thought can become a breath of celestial being that distinguishes you from others.
Life does not need to work hard all the time. Reading fluent texts, listening to music and playing small games is also fun, or it can also become an interest in enriching life. Yes, if your life has things to focus on and growth in progress, this can certainly be a way to pass the time by standing aside. But if in life, all you can get is entertainment, and serious things are all about bragging, then it is better to put more money in the game and be a player who doesn't need to "explode your liver" late at night.
Thirty and standing, do not break do not stand.
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